Why Do Men Cheat?

http://www.dreamstime.com/royalty-free-stock-images-arguing-young-married-couple-over-white-background-image30281419The pain and feelings of betrayal after a husband has cheated on his partner is one of the hardest things to over come. Can it be overcome? Yes. We understand that no marriage is perfect, however, knowing that both men and women have their faults never justifies infidelity or does it excuse it in any way. We believe it is wrong and extremely painful. It is a poor decision that can forever harm the marriage unless proper steps are taken. See the quick start page for emergency marriage help. So, why do men cheat?

Why men cheat is a common question, and there are plenty of reasons given. Once again, these do not justify the behavior, but here is what may be heard.

Time and time again, you see a guy who has a lovely wife. She may be pretty, smart, a hard worker, and very good to him. However, still he has a wondering eye. Sometimes it is said that it has to do with boosting the ego. Many men who are not in control of that part of their life as of yet may associate who they are with their conquests. They love the thrill of the chase. They may really love the person they are in a relationship with. However, it takes a true love and commitment, not just an emotional feeling of love that will keep a person faithful to their spouse.

We talk a lot about women needing to have their emotional needs met, and this is very true. However, men can also feel like they aren’t emotionally getting their needs met at home. This is a fairly common reason stated as to why men cheat. They may start talking to a woman at work or an old flame just to have someone to talk to. They enjoy the way it feels to laugh, to share, and to have that connection and openly talk about anything and everything. Then it moves into a physical relationship over time.

Having the wrong type of friends and going out drinking with those buddies can result in behavior that may lead into an affair. Sometimes a man may want to show off to his buddies that they still have what it takes to get the girl they are all looking at that evening. They may have no intentions of following through with anything, but just add in some alcohol and it can give a guy confidence and remove inhibitions that normally would prevent him from acting in such a horrible way.

It almost goes without saying but so many men have an extremely strong sexual appetite and they may feel like they need to cheat on their wives in order to get it fulfilled. Women often have their hands full with work, the home, and children. It can leave them exhausted. Sometimes this results in less sexual intimacy in the relationship as the wife may resent the husband as she feels like he doesn’t understand or want to help her. But remember, is that an excuse for cheating? No, absolutely not. However, it is something to watch out for.

Some men say they get bored with routine at home. They take for granted the person they are with. Perhaps the “spark” left a long time ago but because of the commitment they made to each other, the couple continues to live together. This could be for the children, financial reasons, or even the fear of starting over. With busy schedules, a couple can find it is hard for them to reconnect at the end of the day. This is why it is so important to keep the relationship vibrant and alive.

Whatever the reason that is given for an extramarital affair is not good enough. However, remember that a majority of couples can make it if they take the correct steps.


Worship Pastor, Educational Leader. Husband, Father, and lover of God.

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